Building trust is the best method to perpetrate a scam.
Unfortunately, it is really easy to simulate building trust.
This is an existential problem of our society. It affects how we respond to politics, investment opportunities, and our relationships with friends and family.
If the following story does not scare you about how much time and thought is spent on engineering false trust, then be prepared to be scammed. You can avoid it, of course, but you must be diligent about how and whom you trust.
“I’m scammed almost every day. Or, if not scammed, at the very least someone tries to scam me. Usually more than once a day.”
James Altucher
The Ingenious Flower Scam
A sophisticated scammer recently targeted us using an elaborate scheme that began with something as innocent as flowers. This wasn’t just theft. It was psychological manipulation designed to build trust before attempting a much larger fraud. Here’s how it unfolded and what you can learn from our experience.
How the Scam Worked
The attack started with an online flower order placed using our stolen credit card information. The scammer deliberately chose a small amount and requested the flowers be delivered to our actual address. This combination kept the transaction from triggering fraud alerts. This wasn’t random – it was the foundation of their con.
When my wife noticed the charge on our credit card app, she was puzzled but not alarmed. Minutes later, her phone rang from an unknown number.
The caller claimed to be from our credit card company’s fraud department. He said their system had flagged the flower charge as suspicious and explained that he was following up because we’d had to replace cards before (which was true). Everything he said seemed reasonable and matched our experience.
The scammer then walked through what appeared to be standard security procedures:
- He confirmed our address (which he rattled off accurately)
- He offered to cancel the card and send a replacement overnight
- He provided “helpful” advice about card security at gas stations and restaurants
- He claimed to see our online shopping accounts and offered to help secure them
The Psychological Manipulation
Here’s where the scam became genuinely sophisticated. The scammer sent us a text message asking us to confirm whether the flower charge was legitimate – respond “Y” for yes, “N” for no. When my wife accidentally responded “Y” (thinking it meant “yes, it was fraudulent”), we immediately received another text saying, “Thank you. Please continue working with the Agent you are speaking to.”
This created a false sense of legitimacy. The scammer had engineered a scenario where we appeared to be communicating with our actual credit card company through multiple channels.
Red Flags We Should Have Caught
Even with our cautious approach, several warning signs emerged:
The “Verification” Trick: When I expressed doubt about the caller’s legitimacy, he encouraged me to call back to verify, knowing that scammers often have accomplices ready to answer verification calls. The only safe approach is to hang up and call the official number on your credit card.
Too Much Personal Information: The scammer rattled off detailed personal information about us, some of which seemed impressive but is available through paid databases and data brokers.
The Critical Mistake: He provided an old expiration date for one of our cards instead of the current one – a slip that revealed he was working from stolen data rather than live account information.
Requesting Sensitive Information: He asked for the security code on the back of our card, which legitimate credit card companies typically don’t need when they call you.
Essential Anti-Scam Strategies
Before You Get Scammed
Monitor Your Accounts Religiously: Set up real-time notifications for all transactions, regardless of their size. The flower charge was our early warning system.
Know Your Credit Card Company’s Policies: Most legitimate fraud departments won’t call asking for your full card details if they’re the ones initiating contact about suspicious activity.
Understand Social Engineering: Scammers excel at using small amounts of accurate information to build credibility. Don’t be impressed by someone knowing your address or purchase history. This information is more widely available than you think.
During a Suspicious Call
Never Provide Sensitive Information: Legitimate companies don’t need your security code, full account numbers, or passwords when they call you.
Don’t Trust Caller ID: Scammers can spoof phone numbers to make calls appear to come from legitimate companies.
The Verification Trap: If someone tells you to “call back to verify,” they may have accomplices waiting. Always hang up and call the official number on your card or statement.
Question Urgency: Scammers create artificial time pressure. Legitimate fraud departments will work with your schedule and won’t pressure you to act immediately.
If You Suspect a Scam
Hang Up Immediately: Don’t worry about being rude. End the call and contact your credit card company directly using the phone number on the back of your card.
Document Everything: Record the caller’s number, the claims made, and the timeline of events.
Secure Your Accounts: Change passwords and remove saved payment methods from online accounts if you suspect they’ve been compromised.
Report the Fraud: Contact your credit card company, local police, and the Federal Trade Commission.
What Happened Next
While we were on the call with the scammer, I contacted our credit card company directly. They confirmed no fraud alert had been issued and no agent was calling us. The scammer attempted to place a nearly $10,000 order using our information, but the credit card company blocked it.
Two days later, the flowers arrived. It was probably intended as a middle finger to us, but our card provider also removed the flower charge. Instead, it served as a reminder of how close we came to a much more expensive lesson.
Key Takeaways
Small Charges Can Be a SetUp: Criminals use small, seemingly innocent purchases to establish credibility and test stolen card information.
Information Isn’t Verification: Just because someone knows personal details about you doesn’t mean they’re legitimate.
Trust Your Instincts: If something feels off, it probably is. Don’t let politeness override your security instincts.
When in Doubt, Hang Up: The safest response to any suspicious call is to end it and contact the company directly through official channels.
This scam was particularly insidious because it combined stolen financial information with psychological manipulation and social engineering. The flowers weren’t just theft, they were an investment in gaining our trust for a much larger payday. By understanding these tactics, you can better protect yourself from similar schemes.